Tue 6 Aug 2002
The Strangest Feeling
Posted by Sandi Atherton under Daily Life, germany
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I took my kids to the doctor to get a check up that is needed for school and while in the waiting room my 3 year old was very talkative. Everyone was staring at us and I saw the other kids whispering to each other about her speaking English. I found myself trying to say as little as possible and when I did have to speak to my kids I would try to say it in German. If I did not know how, then I called them over to me where I could whisper in English to them. In retrospect, I realize that I was embarrassed by the fact we were talking in English. Strange how I miss having good English conversations and yet here it embarrasses me. I’m not sure if it is the fact that I am not used to the staring yet or if it is the fact that everyone knows we are different from them. Am I just way to hung up on what others think of me and is this something that fades with time? I wonder what I will do in a similar situation a year from now. Will I still hide from my background or will I become proud of the knowledge that I am different? And at what point does speaking German become hiding verses good learning?
